zeldathemes
The Word of Chris
equally as terrible at poetry as being a human

Sir Chris of the extremely attractive and multi-talented culinary and design field (3rd class), with a special mention in the musical and all things gay division, genuine stupid person and general winner of cards against humanity, recently elected president of the funny hat club, topped off with a somewhat recent coronation in the 'cockblocking of posts' [and add something about being single as a pringle]

summersinthesky:

WHY IS THIS BUNNY WEARING A BACKPACK? WHERE IS HE GOING TO GO? WHAT DOES HE HAVE IN THIS BACKPACK?

summersinthesky:

WHY IS THIS BUNNY WEARING A BACKPACK? WHERE IS HE GOING TO GO? WHAT DOES HE HAVE IN THIS BACKPACK?

  #queue queue k-choo  

This is Miss Mori, one of our brightest.

  #queue queue k-choo  
superwholock-fantastic:

The more you look at it tHE BETTER IT GETS

superwholock-fantastic:

The more you look at it tHE BETTER IT GETS

  #queue queue k-choo  

luvr4photography:

assilikesbowties:

the three amigos ride again

ITS FUDCKING BACK ITS FUCKINB BACK THEY’RE FUCKING BACK 

  #queue queue k-choo  

mishasminions:

JUST FUCKING KISS ALREADY

  #queue queue k-choo  

What if
all women were bigger and stronger than you
and thought they were smarter

What if
women were the ones who started wars

What if
too many of your friends had been raped by women wielding giant dildos
and no K-Y Jelly

What if
the state trooper
who pulled you over on the New Jersey Turnpike
was a woman
and carried a gun

What if
the ability to menstruate
was the prerequisite for most high-paying jobs

What if
your attractiveness to women depended
on the size of your penis

What if
every time women saw you
they’d hoot and make jerking motions with their hands

What if
women were always making jokes
about how ugly penises are
and how bad sperm tastes

What if
you had to explain what’s wrong with your car
to big sweaty women with greasy hands
who stared at your crotch
in a garage where you are surrounded
by posters of naked men with hard-ons

What if
men’s magazines featured cover photos
of 14-year-old boys
with socks
tucked into the front of their jeans
and articles like:
“How to tell if your wife is unfaithful”
or
“What your doctor won’t tell you about your prostate”
or
“The truth about impotence”

What if
the doctor who examined your prostate
was a woman
and called you “Honey”

What if
you had to inhale your boss’s stale cigar breath
as she insisted that sleeping with her
was part of the job

What if
you couldn’t get away because
the company dress code required
you wear shoes
designed to keep you from running

And what if
after all that
women still wanted you
to love them.

For the Men Who Still Don’t Get It, written 20 years ago by Carol Diehl. 

She wrote a post about the history of this poem that is worth reading.

(via archangvl)

SHITSHITSHITSHITSHIT

(via sulfurkitten)

  #things people say that are far more intelligent than me    #queue queue k-choo  

fabadon:

a scientific analysis of the molly hooper kiss

  #queue queue k-choo  

natsui:

how come i can keep a poker face on when reading aggressive frickling and frackling but i end up a gooey mess when there are cute nose boops and shy kisses and shit

  #queue queue k-choo  

endquestionmark:

[blogger stares into distance as titanic theme plays]

  #queue queue k-choo  
ridge:

im so mad

ridge:

im so mad

  #queue queue k-choo  

captainarlert:

your-crimson-arrow:

captainarlert:

your-crimson-arrow:

captainarlert:

I’m just going to replace the word “half” with Marco.

It’s about Marco past nine, I need to finish my homework before I Petra into a wall of frustration.

you think you’re so funny don’t you

Only like Erwin of the time.

stop horsing around

Don’t jeanp to horse jokes

  #texty things    #queue queue k-choo  

wingchestr:

my biggest question is why do half of these pictures exist

  #queue queue k-choo  

thefrogman:

[video] [h/t: pleatedjeans]

  #queue queue k-choo  
  #queue queue k-choo  

exponentiallyfandomatic:

alwaysadisneyday:

The ladies of Disney.

IT’S BY HAIR COLOR

  #queue queue k-choo